Does Being Single Mean You’re Lonely?
As I was writing the “About Me” section on my blog, my 12 –year-old sister sat beside me. When I was typing the words “Hi! My name is Micah Sarceno. A 24-year-old…” I heard her say “Single.”
Me: What? Why do I need to put that?
Ella: Just in case somebody who’ll read it wants to be with you.
Ella: How will they know you’re single if you won’t put it there? I want you to have a
Ella: Because you’re so lonely!
I paused while I was trying to reflect on what she said. Am I really lonely? I’m not going to lie. Sometimes, I feel that I am. I do wonder what it’s like to have someone to talk to other than my family and my friends. Someone to hold, someone to share everything with, and someone to love. Most of all, I wonder what it’s like to be loved.
Don’t get me wrong. I know that I am loved by God and my family, but I do believe that God has put a desire in us to love and to be loved by a significant other. Adam didn’t find a suitable helper in the form of animals and that’s why God created Eve. So, I grew up thinking someone out there was made specifically for me. But, where is he now?
When you’re 24 and still single, you always get asked a lot about your relationship status. None so far is my constant answer. When you get those kinds of questions a lot, you start to get frustrated. They make you feel that being single at 24 is not right and I have to do something about it. It even got to the point when I asked God “Is there something wrong with me, Lord?” And even questioned the future “Will I ever get married, Lord?”
When my sister told me that I was lonely, there was a sad vibe that went into my body for a few seconds. But God took it out immediately and replaced it with memories. What kind? Memories of when I was just alone- driving in the car, working in the office, sitting in my room. And what was I doing during those moments when I was all by myself? Singing. I was singing to the Lord. Happy songs, comforting songs, and assuring songs. I laughed, I cried, and I felt assured.
In those moments of aloneness, God never failed to reveal Himself to me. I’ve realized that there are somethings in life that you can do and have only when you’re single. Do I ever get jealous of others? Of course! Do I want to have what they have? Definitely! Will I trade those years of singleness for a relationship? Absolutely not. Singleness is the best stage of your life. Treat it as a gift from and for God.
Lonely? With God, never.